How I Help my Autistic and ADHD Clients

If you’ve ever looked at my directory profiles, you’ve probably seen that I am AUDHD; I was diagnosed later in life with ADHD and also have autistic traits. I’ve written in detail previously about my experience in this blog.

Many clients come to me because they are neurodivergent or wondering if they might be. Some are just starting to explore what that means, some are on the waiting lists for assessment, while others are recently diagnosed and struggling to make sense of what it means for them.   

Of course, no two people are the same; we all have different strengths, sensory preferences, family backgrounds, and life experiences. Finding a therapist who understands neurodivergence but takes the time to understand you as a unique individual, can make a real difference to your experience. 

I offer a free online introductory call as a starting point. It’s a chance for us to explore what’s been going on for you, how neurodivergence might be affecting your life, and what you might want from therapy.  Here’s how I can support you:

Sensory Overwhelm

If loud noises feel unbearable, bright lights trigger your migraines, or everyday noises make your skin crawl, you are definitely not alone. Sensory overwhelm is something that lots of neurodivergent people live with. 

 Because I experience this myself, I try to make our sessions as relaxed and comfortable as possible. In online sessions, you’re welcome to have whatever helps nearby; this can be drinks and fidget toys, a blanket, cushion or soft toy. If you get interrupted or lose your train of thought, that’s not a problem, I can wait or can remind you where you had got to in a story. For face-to-face sessions, I give clear directions, meet you at the door and make sure you know what to expect. The room is calm and predictable, changes are kept to a minimum between sessions, with no harsh lighting and no undue stress. I bring along fidget toys, water and plenty of cushions, and you can bring whatever makes you feel at ease, within reason. 

Deciding to Get Assessed - or Not

You might be at a point where you are questioning whether you might be autistic or ADHD, have dyslexia, dyscalculia, dyspraxia or more. Therapy can be a space to explore what this looks like for you, without any pressure to make a decision at that point. For some, this might lead to asking for a formal assessment. For others, simply understanding themselves better might be enough. Either decision is valid, and we can take time to figure out what works best for you.  

Preparing for Assessment

When an assessment finally comes, it can feel intense and occasionally overwhelming in the weeks before. You might worry about what questions will be asked, how clear they will be for you, and you might doubt yourself or minimise your life experiences. 

I can help you to prepare, by thinking how your traits show up in real life. For example, you might say you’re ‘never late’, but if we look closer, that might be because you rely on multiple alarms or anxiety to stay on track. If those systems fail, things can quickly unravel. 

We can explore what is really going on beneath the surface, so that you have a better understanding and more confidence in explaining the impact on your life. Being prepared isn’t ‘cheating’, it means you are less likely to freeze or go blank in the middle of the assessment.

Image shows a row of colourful toy figurines with happy faces

Post-Diagnosis Therapy 

Getting a diagnosis can often bring relief and validation, but it might also bring some grief, anger and sadness about how things should have been, leading to a period of adjustment and acceptance. You might look back at your life through a new lens, make sense of past experiences and begin to let go of self-blame. 

This can also involve questions about unmasking, what it means for your identity, and what changes, if any, you want to make in your life. For some, this might include shifts in relationships, work or lifestyle. We can work through this at your pace, in a way that feels safe and manageable. 

Executive Function and Relationships

ADHD can make everyday life feel much harder, more stressful than it ‘should’ be. Things like procrastination, ‘ADHD paralysis’, time blindness, impulsivity and disorganisation can take a real toll on your self-esteem.  

In our work together, we focus on what matters most to you. Rather than trying to fix everything at once (which never works!), we take things step-by-step and build realistic, supportive structures around your daily life. 

There’s no judgement here. Whether it’s unpaid bills, uncleaned teeth or the dreaded ‘floordrobe’, I understand how chaotic daily life can be, and we can search for solutions that are more likely to last, not become another source of shame. 

Being autistic sometimes brings real challenges. You might just feel different, struggle with communication or find social situations completely draining. Feeling like you don’t have ‘the rule book’ on life can really impact your self-esteem and lead to you quietly withdrawing from the outside world. You may have ‘autistic burnout’, despite being a ‘highflyer’ at work, and getting your diagnosis might be the first thing that has made sense in your life. Together, we can explore what works for you, what doesn’t, so that you can start to create a life that feels more sustainable and less exhausting.

Addressing Masking and Authenticity

Many neurodivergent people have spent years adapting and minimising themselves to fit in, at work, in relationships and in wider society. Therapy gives you space to explore what this has cost you. I can help you to identify your true needs and preferences, and what you might want to do differently. Unmasking isn’t always a straightforward choice, and it doesn’t have to be ‘all or nothing’. I can support you in understanding your needs, building confidence in expressing them and navigating things like workplace accommodations and reasonable adjustments. We can also work with self-criticism, shame, and the pressure to ‘keep up’ with others. 

Recognising Your Strengths and Unique Skills

It’s so easy to focus only on the difficulties that you can experience, especially if you have spent years struggling and wondering why. But you have strengths too, you might have great creativity, deep focus, empathy, problem solving skills and a fine attention to detail, for example. Part of our work can be identifying and valuing those strengths and finding ways to use them in your life. 

For some people this can lead to rethinking career paths, relationships, or how they spend their free time. For others, it might be about giving themselves permission to enjoy what they enjoy, without any shame or guilt.  

My Approach

My aim is always that therapy is a place where you don’t have to explain or justify yourself, where things start to make sense, maybe for the first time. Whether you’re exploring, waiting, newly diagnosed, or somewhere in-between, we can work together in a way that truly fits you and your needs.  

If you are curious about working with me, click here to book a free 20-minute, no obligation discussion.